January 2024 Update

Processing of grief and death are very personal and being able to express emotions is important. The loss is heavy for me and there is still frequent shedding of tears. I have a very spiritual view of death in that I believe we live on after we shed this immortal coil. Yet the physical loss and other changes to life are strikingly difficult, affecting me deeply; I more easily can embrace those sayings, like “seize the day!”, “live every day like it’s your last”, and “no regrets”.

Last summer I had my own brush with death and had surgery to repair an aortic aneurysm. My mother witnessed my collapse at the DMV and watched in horror as EMTs loaded me into an ambulance; we are both still recovering from that unexpected, frightening event.

Although I was faced with my own mortality, it hasn’t affected me the way the same way as my father’s passing has. His incident is now starting to feel more like Live! Let go of fear of failure, fear of judgment, fear of what other people think of you. Relax and be yourself. Relearn to be yourself. You are enough. It’s letting go of all of the places where I put myself down or hold myself back – the ego mind. This is a clarity I’ve been looking for for a long time, and now it’s just suddenly appeared. Yes, I recognize that I have been working on myself for years. And now I’m finally ready.

Here’s to you on your journey to inner peace.